It is time to start loving yourself, for real!

The simplicity of transformation is profound. Ask yourself, is what I am thinking, saying and doing at any moment during the day a true example of me showing approval, acceptance, respect and love towards myself? It is vital that you be honest in your inquiry. If you are uncertain you may want to reach out to someone you trust and who will be honest with you.

If your answer is no, then ask yourself what is blocking me from authentically loving myself. The answer will always be found inside you, in your thinking, in your thoughts and beliefs about who you think you are, about your believed value and worth as a human being. It is always our present self image that determines the level of respect that we have towards ourselves and also, what we will be able to achieve in our life.

It is this type of work that I believe is what true transformation and even recovery is really all about. I also believe that the reason why our society and treatment industry are failing miserably is that they are not looking in the right places for the problem and as a result asking the wrong questions with respect to a solution. The answer to the epidemic will only be found within the individual addict or alcoholic, not externally.

It is time to start a conversation about the importance of self love. It is time to start a conversation about self love and how it is missing in the life of the addict and alcoholic. It is time to start a conversation about how we can help addicts and alcoholics to learn how to authentically love themselves. It is time for addicts and alcoholics to start loving themselves, for real!

Dr. Harry Henshaw

The Power of Perseverance

Impatience is simply resistance to change. Many addicts and alcoholics are very impatient when it comes to doing the work that would transform their life if they engaged in and completed it. Simply stated, many addicts and alcoholics want the rewards or promises but do not want to do the work that is necessary to experience the transformation.

This is especially prevalent with respect to an addict and alcoholic considering changing their thinking. To have a true transformation of thought and attitude, to transform how they think and feel about themselves, others and life in general, requires a great deal of work and perseverance. Doing this type of work requires going to any length necessary to experience the transformation.

Taking an honest look at oneself, discovering how much one does not respect, accept, approve or love themselves is very difficult and even painful. While this condition can be transformed, most addicts and alcoholic will resist doing the work necessary to change their thinking. Many adamently resist doing the work assigned to transform and tend to believe they can find an "easier, softer way."

Perseverance, never giving up, is necessary if your are to truly transform your thinking and your life and end your addiction to drugs and alcohol. There is absolutely no substitute for hard work, to constantly working on transforming ones thoughts and thinking about oneself, of creating a new and positive self image. The power of perseverance does transform.

Dr. Harry Henshaw

Improve Self Esteem, Change Your Life!

Anyone ever think that learning to love yourself can actually heal your life? Anyone ever think that learning to love yourself could actually end your use of and addiction to drugs and alcohol? Could it be this simple? What possibilities open up for you if it is this simple?

If we learned to respect, approve, accept and love ourselves then we would not do anything to harm ourselves. What we think about our value and worth as a human being, our self esteem, determines how we treat ourselves and is the key to transforming our life and to ending our use of drugs and alcohol.

When we accept this simple idea and as a result, learn how to authentically love ourselves, we will heal our life. When we learn how to believe that we truly matter, we will heal our life and end our use of drugs and alcohol. Is it time that you learn how to love yourself? Improve your self esteem, change your life!

Dr. Harry Henshaw

You are Responsible!

Why do most addicts and alcoholics adamently resist and even deny the possibility that the cause of their addiction is to be found within them, that the real cause of their using is a negative thought or belief about their value and worth as a human being?

The answer is simple. If they were to admit that they were the cause of their condition they would have to take responsibility for what they are creating. To take full and complete responsibility would also necessitate that they would have to stop blaming other people, places and things.

Not that addicts and alcoholics have a monopoly on denying their responsibility in their condition and life in general but that until our responsibility is completely accepted and acted upon we will not change let alone transform our life. All will remain the same. For addicts and alcoholics the consequences of no change or transformation can be fatal.

Dr. Harry Henshaw

10 Ways to Begin to Love Yourself

Loving yourself is a very powerful way to transform your life.  Loving yourself is the true and only solution to your drug and alcohol addiction.  Loving yourself is also the key to mental health.  Loving yourself is the real way to have a healthy and happy life.

Below are some daily things that you can do to begin to love yourself.  It is important to practice all of them daily.  Perseverance is very important here. Learning to love yourself requires action, both psychological and physical.  Loving yourself is a daily practice of transformation.

1. Practice acceptance.  Stop all criticism and judgment of yourself and others.

2. Practice being present to the moment, to the Now and to what you think and say.

3. Choose to say only positive things about yourself and others.

4. Make time daily to practice positive affirmations.

5. Create and rehearse a gratitude list in the morning upon waking.

6. Acknowledge yourself and others throughout the day.

7. Create a Daily Health Plan in the morning and review it at night.

8. Practice meditation as it helps you to keep connected to the present, to the Source of your Power.

9. Practice forgiveness, of letting go of and giving up the past.

10. Be conscious of how you treat your body, including what and how you eat.

Dr. Harry Henshaw 

The Real Problem and Solution!

The real problem of substance abuse and drug and alcohol addiction is that the addict or alcoholic does not think that they are good enough and as a result experiences a lack of self love. Learning to authentically love yourself is the true solution to substance abuse and drug and alcohol addiction. It is that simple.

Dr. Harry Henshaw

The Secret Root Cause of Addiction

Addicts and alcoholics use drugs and alcohol because of a negative self image and the resulting poor self esteem. Addicts and alcoholics do not like themselves, do not love themselves, do not believe that they are enough, do not believe that they are good enough, believe that they are inadequate, incompetent, a failure, a loser, not lovable and many other negative thoughts and beliefs about their value and worth as a human being.  Addicts and alcoholics created this self-limiting belief themselves.  The "disease," if you will, of addiction is merely a belief and a belief that can be changed or transformed.

Addicts and alcoholics are completely responsible for their drug and alcohol addiction because they are responsible for creating their negative thinking about themselves. Addicts and alcoholics do not use because of the drugs, the alcohol, drug dealers, physicians, pharmaceutical companies, their environment, their past, their families, including their parents, childhood trauma, their genetics or any other excuse that can be created with the intent of denying the responsibility that rests solely with the individual addict and alcoholic.  Addicts and alcoholic use because of the negative self-image that they choose to create and let run their life.  However, there is hope.

If you are an addict or alcoholic, you are only one thought or belief away from transforming your life and ending your addiction and use of drugs and alcohol forever! Learning to love yourself and believe that you are good enough, that you and your life matter, will change the trajectory of your life and eventually end your drug and alcohol addiction and use. This work is about changing your thinking about yourself, about your value and worth as a human being and is something that you can do! Changing your thinking and learning to love yourself, to believe that you good enough just as you are, rather than not, is the real secret and solution to your transformation and recovery.

Dr. Harry Henshaw

The Mirror knows the truth.

Whatever you believe you have done to transform your life, call it recovery or something else, the proof of whether your work has in fact transformed you and your life is to be found in the mirror. While you are working on yourself, becoming present to yourself in the mirror will reveal the truth about your work. The truth of your work always gets revealed in your feelings about your reflection in the mirror. You can say or even attempt to believe anything about your efforts to transform but only the mirror knows the truth and knows it instantly. Your recovery and transformation is with the woman or man in the mirror.

Dr. Harry Henshaw

Denial of Reality

The desire to deny reality is very strong in those suffering from drug and alcohol abuse. The act of using drugs and alcohol is clearly an act of harming if not killing the self. There is absolutely no respect or love towards oneself in that type of behavior regardless of how you think about it. In fact, drugs and alcohol are merely the instruments that one uses for self execution. This fact is undeniable.

Even in the face of reality, many individuals in recovery deny the most obvious, that they simply do not like or love themselves, that they believe that they are not good enough and as a result suffer from poor self esteem as well. Simply stated, they deny not only reality but that which if they accepted and acknowledged would begin the path of authentic recovery and transformation.

"Lets look at some of the ways we don't love ourselves. We mistreat our bodies with food, alcohol, and drugs." Louise Hay

Dr. Harry Henshaw

Denial of Poor Self Esteem

Denial is a very powerful defense mechanism that we utilize as human beings. The purpose of denial is to reduce anxiety and protect us from the negative impact of such an emotion. Sometimes denial can be used in the service of health and sometimes denial can be used to support pathology and even ones demise.

Many individuals entering recovery and even some who have been in the program for awhile do not accept the relationship between their addiction to drugs and alcohol and poor self esteem. Simply stated, they tend to believe that poor self esteem has nothing to do with their addiction let alone that it is the cause of their condition.

Unfortunately, denying that something is a problem does not make it so. To take a look inside and find out that you do not like or even do not love yourself can be very anxiety provoking. When individuals initially explore their inner world, they do not like what they find and many have a tendency to deny what they discover, finding the anxiety to be overwhelming.

To make the psychological move from denial to acceptance is to begin the path of transformation. To stop denying the fact that you do not think that you are good enough and as a result do not love yourself, that you have poor self esteem and begin to accept and face reality creates the space for a true and lasting breakthrough in your life. To continue to live your life in a state of denial will negate the transformation that you seek.

Dr. Harry Henshaw